I wish I had music listening options on the other side of the house. cause I kinda feel all motivated to clean the bathroom and whatnot, but I really want to listen to Ilya. Oh, conflicts.

I suppose I could put that Primus video on.. or Viewphoria.. or one of those countless tapes of random music videos I recorded. Ha.

At least I managed to finally discover the air conditioning unit in my grandmother's room, so at least I can return to sleeping in a somewhat comfortable manner. Which allowed me to move the bed out of the living room.

...yeah. I sleep a lot, when I sleep. Otherwise I stay up three nights a week and try to convince myself I'm dreaming while I'm awake; when I'm dreaming, I'm...

well. Sometime last week (? It could have been Wednesday or Sunday or Tuesday, time stretches) I had one of those day long dreams of epic proportions, of trying to save people, to get them out of the building about to disintergrate, to get them on the bus and out of the town; waking up with a cry, but cannot remember whether it was Nick or my mom I was .talking to..

It was Wednesday night, and it set off a mood, and then it went deeper, and a few days later, here we are. I need a new job. I need. to do things.

I want to go to sleep, to wrap my arm around the curve of the pillow; leave the tv on quietly so I don't think much