of course i still have yet to write down the lot of last year. of course i can't make a sentence without pushing one word over here throwing in five more and mixing them all up until i like the way it looks. of course it's the first day of the new year and i've got to get ready to go to work.

january 1 2003.

i waited all last year for this year and maybe it's that or maybe it's only tradition, this feeling of renewal [because the new year rolling over holds no effect on actual life not school not age not time. no one says, "happy birthday time! you are now two thousand and three!" you know why? because time has no friends, he is all alone, the poor dear]

i was talking to my dad about the best way to get the lingering smell of bleach off my hands. he tells me lemon juice is the way to go. it appears blue rooms and blue sheets work just as well.

a;sdkfajs;dlkfajsd;aovbiuadfg; is THE EXACT PRECISE description of how i feel right now. january january january the word is so much fun to say january first and january fourth and january eighteenth and january twentysixth [what is the 26th? someone's birthday or something, i'm sure. everyone's birthday is in january. 11 17 18 24 2654654.]

i don't know. good-- no. superb mood and i don't write enough because being here is in between work and other places and nights like two nights ago when i am here and should clean or write or do things that are productive i go to sleep at six pm and wake up at one to play music with new toys [danelectro hodad danecho and the newest, the unquietly large box claiming the name 'marshall'] for two hours then go back to sleep like the slugabed i am.

vicious vicious cycle don't you know and now i have to gooo to worook