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what am i doing here? i should go home and go to bed. but i can't. because i'm sitting around like a silly girl thinking my boyfriend is mad at me or ______ just because i haven't talked to him in half a day. i'm sure he's around playing music or hey! maybe writing his paper or.. doing something fun. and i think these things, but logic is easily over-looked when the others start festering--the insecure ones, the irrational ones; the ones that i am trying to escape for love's sake. as i fight against these thoughts, they multiply and they complicate, and sometimes i am not strong enough to keep up the battle. still, i keep my ammunition loaded and the safety catch off... because whatever patterns i see forming... i cannot, will not sit by and watch them establish themselves.
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