we don't talk anymore, that one and i. sometimes i spy on him, most times i leave it alone. the only time i really jump in and say hello is after i've had a dream about him. this one i don't know was about him but it was certainly in it. had he been online this morning i might have said hello and perhaps gone into it, but i'm still thinking about it and still trying to figure it out so better i didn't.

i was walking down the street to oz, trying to get a job as web designer (for a strip club?? strange dreams lately.. at least they're coming back to me, i was missing them)

there was a girl standing under a covered bus stop, her long brown hair a mess, her color-streaked dress was to her knees and shapeless. she held a cardboard sign like a person asking for money or food or work, but on her sign she'd written "can i ask you a question?"

i walked past her, making eye contact at first and then lowering my eyes to the sidewalk like i was shaking my head. she said something i don't remember. it wasn't until i was far enough away that i said, under my breath, "i don't have any answers." somehow she heard me and said something, "yes" maybe or something.. i don't remember.

she became a bad person. i'd come across her, she was trying to get sean to go on a date with her and he was refusing, at the same time i was talking to her about that, nick was calling me and i knew without answering what it was about.. and there he was, walking down the street, holding her hand, looking rather uncomfortable because he hadn't figured away out of it.

there are pieces of this dream that i figure out, where this came from and where that came from. but as a whole.. i have a couple ideas but i can't grasp it. i.. i dunno. it was an interesting dream. not the kind of dream that is my opinion of things as they happen or will happen, for all my spy-related premontions, i see them well, i see them a little bit funny in the realm of How Things Come to Pass, but they are positive.. that's not the point though. maybe dreams don't mean anything as a whole. maybe i'm just looking for meaning and i'll find it where ever i want to.

there was more to the dream. a mixture of room, a mixture of sheets, the realization that it wasn't a dream and i was in the wrong place. i turned to the wall and i said something that filled the room with sadness. i mentioned the fact that i had moved to another planet, uranus specfically, which i look up and see is the planet that rules aquarius, the planet of upheaval and revolution.

he got on the phone, talking to the same girl or a different girl.. something. he said this momentary This was over and he was now onto That, that This had made him stronger and more willing

and then it was over and i was swept away to the Renaissance Festival of Dreams, it is halloween there, there was a show to put on and real people trying to do real harm to our patrons and i needed to hit them in the chest with a big, fat stick.