apples + gorgonzola = happyhappyhappy.

in other news of happiness, mom's surgery was finally completed. i talked to her about an hour ago. she sounded a little drugged--talking to her soup, i think--but that's expected.

i feel i am in a much different place than i was a month ago... so i feel much better taking this two week sojourn to chicago

now, as opposed to, say, last month. i feel stable in my head and in my self.. almost more importantly, i feel stable in my relationship. i'm not going to spend this two weeks talking myself out of love like i might have done last month.

minimalism. planning. creating.

now i have a little room to clean so it will be in order upon my return and i will not be greeted with the usual mess and clutter

a list to be written, items i will bring with me.. hopefully in the new minimalist fashion. then, after two weeks with only my most treasured and necessary belongings, i will be able to wield my discerning eye over the rest of these stuffs, invoke the queen of wands and get rid of it, get rid of all of it.

what to bring? there are the unquestioned essentials. medicines, toothbrush, ipod.

clothes should be relatively easy. i recently went through a period of wearing all black or grey, feeling that would assist me in my activities, it felt like a uniform... until the days around my birthday. i wore shorts and bright oranges or blues, declaring the arrival of the thaw, trying to influence the weather as i usually do

so, clothes. books?

i'm going to be doing things for the moms, but i'm going to have a lot of free time on my hands. and in that free time, i plan on USING my hands. makingcreatingarithmetic.

music, sureyes. photos if i can weasel a copy of photoshop. HERE'S THE THING:

i feel like writing, which is generally my main thrust, HAS LEFT ME IN THE DUST. like i've forgotten how to do it or
why i
ever

...

being in a fresh space, clean and mostly unfamiliar to me, in my mother's energy will help. the meditation will help. the stretching. the lending of my hands, the doing for someone else will help

reading will help.

so will paying attention.

just like listening to the strumming patterns of dance bands
if you don't know how, listen

AH