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it's a particle, it's a wave.

22 august 2001
105am

so.

here i am.

that's about it so far. my roommates aren't terrors, the teachers that i've met so far have all been decent if not more. schedule:

tuesdays & thursdays:

9am - sls

10am - psych

4pm - comp1

wednesdays & fridays:

10am - history of motion pictures

no job yet. no extra curricular activites yet.

i haven't yet decided whether or not i like it. it comes and goes. it's a particle, it's a wave. there are moments when i realise how nice it is here, and how different & how it's probably what i need, blah blah.

and then there are moments.. sean came on sunday and i went to his apartment that night. almost right after we laid down to watch cartoons, i started crying. i wanted to go home. i don't want this.

but once again, i wonder if i want to go back home, or if i want to go back in time. and that's the issue i'm having.

of course, with this mood that i'm in, i probably shouldn't be listening to this song over and over again. no matter how i'm feeling, no matter what i'm doing, i will cry whenever i hear it. why it has this effect on me, i have no idea.

mallory (one of my dormmates) was listening to tupac the other day. i was sitting in my room alone, becca was in class. so i shut off my music and listened through the walls just like i used to do when my brother would play it. i'm grateful that whatever album it was, 'life goes on' didn't come on (the song that i'm listening to now), cause i probably would have packed up my backpack, hitched a ride home, never looking back.