i have red hair
i'm in a band (for real. we've had more than three practices, that makes it official--we drew words from a hat for band names and song titles; so far the favourites are anonymous suicidal stoics [hahah], tremble clever foe, and classic quadratic tinkertoys. cannot forget 'frail superlatives. what?')
i want to be a franchise liason so that i may travel for work, go back to school, and figure out what niche of the business market i should make my debut in
i own my car, so i want to buy a new one
sweden is out for now, so amplifier and couch are in
or a road trip
or i'll learn to shoot a gun
all is well and still there is something missing
do not let the gun change the tone of my success
for it is only a passing whim
as they always are
all things pass
under the sun
and this i need remember

i've been reading. first all the god books. valis, good omens, american gods.

then i read the awakening, with crystal clear perfect timing
i will sacrifice myself for no one
other than myself

now i have picked up some virginia woolf, to further the female mind
and then a kurt vonnegut book. something about sirens and titans. dare he not only ask the question of existence, but answer? he dare.

dare he, indeed. there may be a he who dare take stock of these walls for what they are, and may embark to disassemble them. he sees me fragile and keeps his distance

but this is all very strange this year and i have no idea what to make of any of you; you, who do not exist outside of my choosing

do not shock me silly. do not leave me trembling, trembling. i am in no position to be overwhelmed. no waves for me but my own

the new yo la tengo is going to motivate me to get a new cd player for my car because it deserves to be heard in motion

and you can kiss my black ass.